


Tanith Low was back

by JosieRuby1



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: Death, F/M, Grief, Guilt, Loss, Pain, Regrets, tanith is hurting, unremnant tanith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 03:47:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16339235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JosieRuby1/pseuds/JosieRuby1
Summary: Set after Last Stand of Dead Men, ignoring any canon after that [because I have only read a few chapters of the next book] Tanith is no longer a remnant but when she returns not everyone she left behind is still there. Now she'll never get that steak dinner.





	Tanith Low was back

**Author's Note:**

> Day 14 of Fictober: Some People Call This Wisdom

Tanith Low was back.

That was to say that there was no longer a remnant within her and she was thinking her own thoughts again. She felt that saying she was truly back was an overstatement and that she still had a long way to go. She was exhausted, she was grieving, refusing company from many people and those that forced their company on her she shooed out fairly quickly. Well. It was only one person she had shooed out but it was an important one.

“It’s so good to have you back, Tanith,” China Sorrows had said. No, Tanith knew she should be thinking of her as _Grand Mage Sorrows_ now but that was a bit too much to get her head around at the moment. She and China had never particularly got on, accepting each other because of mutual friends and acquaintances but nothing more. And here China was the same picture of beauty and elegance she always was, with a long shaped red dress and red high heels, making her a personal visit.

“I wish I could say the same about myself,” Tanith told her. She was slumped on the sofa, jogging bottoms and a pyjama top and fully aware how much of a mess she looked compared to China. She was always a mess compared to China but normally it was a leather-clad motorbike riding mess rather than an unwashed hair undressed mess. “Alright, you’ve done your duty, I’m alive, I’m myself, I’m sure you’ve got a million things you’d rather do than be here. So… please see yourself out.”

China was going to agree, make some sweet claim that she did wish to be here, but Tanith just held up a hand. “China, I’m tired, you’re busy.” Tanith stopped her, before getting up and walking towards the front door and opening it. “Thank you, goodbye.”

The only person Tanith did want to be around was Ghastly Bespoke. The one person that she couldn’t. She felt a guilt, something that hurt deep into her heart, that she hadn’t done anything earlier about her and Ghastly. That she had been part of never letting it happen. She had been interested in him for the longest time, of course, she had, and she knew of his interest. The timing was never right, it was so easy to make excuses when Ireland was having one disaster after another. But in the end, she had never acted and by the time he acted it had been too late. She would never forget the awkward way he asked her out.

“When this is over, I’m going to make you dinner. You don’t have to like it, and you don’t have to eat it, and I suppose you don’t even have to be there, but… But that’s what I’m going to do.”

It made her laugh to think about it, but the laughter died on her lips as the taste of her tears hit them. It was cute though. Ghastly was cute. And smart and funny and awkward and adorable. She was sure she was in love with him and now he would never know. All his last memories were of her with that disgusting Billy Ray Sanguine.

“Will you have dinner with me?”  
“I’d love to.”

She had been excited, seriously excited. She remembered that one, simple kiss they had shared. Her removing his façade, his shock at the kiss. It was one for the road, she always told herself, one until they got back together and could do it properly. It wasn’t supposed to be the one and only.

People had told her not to feel guilty, they had told her that there was nothing she could have done differently, that there was nothing she had done wrong. She had heard it from Valkyrie, from Skulduggery, from various people in the Sanctuary. She didn’t want to hear it because they were wrong. She had told them, over and over before finally refusing to let anyone in.

“Stop, stop with this bullshit, Skulduggery,” She had snapped. She didn’t swear often but she was tired and hurting and angry and feeling all too much and unable to make sense of a lot of it.

“Some people would call this wisdom,” Skulduggery began to defend himself with his soft silvery voice.

“Well, I call it bullshit,” Tanith told him.

He sighed, as much as someone who didn’t need to breath could sigh. “We’re going to give you some time,” He said. “Allow you to get yourself back together, allow you to grieve, give you the space you claim you want. But understand we are not going to allow you to suffer alone. We’ll step back but we won’t disappear. And we are always, always at the end of the phone.”

She had just waved him off at the time, barely listened. She hadn’t been interested. She wanted to get herself back together, to be fine again or… No, she wanted to punish herself for not doing more, for wasting time, for not being there to save him, for not having that dinner, for not kissing him for longer for not… She knew that it wasn’t what she had done that was the issue here, it was what she hadn’t done.

Weeks past and she was getting regular messages and phone calls from Valkyrie and Skulduggery, most of which she was answering vaguely or not at all. But in the end, she knew they were right. She wasn’t doing well alone. She _hated_ being alone. She pulled out her phone and dialled Valkyrie’s number and placed the phone to her hear.

“Tan?” Valkyrie’s voice was a mixture of emotions, negative and positive and it made for a strangled noise. “Tanith? Do you need something?”

“Val,” Tanith’s voice was scratchy. She hadn’t used it for much more than crying in a while. “Company would be nice.” She murmured.

“Be there in ten.”

And Valkyrie was true to her word, ten minutes later there was a knock on Tanith’s door. Valkyrie looked the same as always, as darkly clad as a necromancer with that look that said I could kill you or cuddle you and it could change any moment.

Valkyrie had gone straight in for the hug before Tanith had the chance to say or do anything more than open the door. It was too much. Tanith had told herself that she was going to keep it together at least for part of a conversation, but here she was in an embrace with her best friend, her sister, and she was sobbing again. Valkyrie led her through to the living room and sat on the sofa with her. She kept Tanith close, let Tanith lean against her, let Tanith cling to her, let Tanith cry into her. She knew it was what she needed.

It would take time. It would take effort and hard work but Tanith Low would be back.


End file.
